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Posts tagged: funny

Enemies
  • Cashier:

    I really like your eyes.

  • Me:

    Thanks. Yours are very nice, too.

  • Cashier:

    You buy a lot of sandwiches here.

  • Me:

    Yeah but not, like, all at once.

  • Cashier:

    Always the same sandwich?

  • Me:

    I sometimes rotate in a new cheese.

  • Cashier:

    Seems boring.

  • Me:

    You are.

  • Cashier:

    Boring?

  • Me:

    We went from best friends to worst enemies in a very short time.

  • Cashier:

    $7.35, please.

  • Me:

    Enemies.

  • Cashier:

    ...

  • Me:

    Keep the change. Have a good day!

/reblogged from lifetime achievement
NOTES: 55 9/24/11, 11:25am FILED UNDER: #enemies  #funny  #chat 
tlbb: i’d say he took it well :-)

tlbb:

i’d say he took it well :-)

/reblogged from tlbb
NOTES: 35 12/3/10, 4:01pm FILED UNDER: #dating  #romance  #ex texts  #funny 
tlbb: Jermainia sends the best Grindr messages.

tlbb:

Jermainia sends the best Grindr messages.

/reblogged from tlbb
NOTES: 53 12/2/10, 4:00pm FILED UNDER: #scat  #funny 
White Whine/White Wine
  • Me:

    I had a really hard time choosing dishwasher detergent at Whole Foods...

  • Wife:

    Hash Tag "white whine"!

  • Me:

    Don't you "hash tag" me in my house!

/reblogged from That's not very ladylike.
11/16/10, 8:21am FILED UNDER: #real life hash tags  #tumblesbians  #marriage  #couples  #1st world problems  #funny 
theduty: i love you, dad.

theduty:

i love you, dad.

/reblogged from certified bullshit technician.
NOTES: 147 11/4/10, 4:31pm FILED UNDER: #the duty  #masturbation  #family  #parents  #funny