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Posts tagged: CAPS

This auto-correct excuse is going to get me out of so many sticky situations
  • Me:

    Wanna come over and do a bunch of cocaine?

  • Guy:

    WHAT?

  • Me:

    Cocaine?

  • Guy:

    No....

  • Me:

    Ooohhhh! Haha Damn auto-correct!

  • Me:

    I meant to say homework

  • Me:

    Not cocaine

  • Me:

    DEFINITELY NOT COCAINE.

The Bacon Pizza Fiasco
  • Guy:

    How could you not like it?

  • Girl:

    I just don't!

  • Me:

    What are we talking about?

  • Guy:

    She doesn't like bacon on her pizza!

  • Me:

    EVVVVVVVILLLLLL!

This following is NOT a serious conversation, I repeat NOT SERIOUS.
  • Nat:

    We need to get you a hobby.

  • Me:

    A baby?

  • Nat:

    No a HOBBY.

  • Me:

    Yes, a BABY.

Grammatical Undoing
  • Molly:

    You & Robert are the SAME!! Only Robert is gay. And awesome.

  • Me:

    wow thanks for saying i'm not awesome. rude.

  • Molly:

    No i included you in that.

  • Me:

    you said we were the same except robert was gay and awesome. the truth comes out. you secretly hate. me.

  • Molly:

    No i just didn't want it to seem like his being gay is something that you are. so i said he's gay. then i was going to say BUT awesome but instead i said AND.

  • Me:

    BECAUSE IT'S WHAT YOU TRULY FEEL. :'(

  • Molly:

    No! I had no idea one conjunction could do so much damage.

  • Me:

    it's done all the damage.

Vagina's In Sync
  • Me:

    I'm on my periods. It's making me sad

  • Lindsay:

    i am too! our vaginas are in sync!

  • Me:

    lkdsjgksdjgs.Vagina Power Touch. BAM! floral power!

  • Lindsay:

    :|

  • Me:

    I wish I knew